To my mind, this is a nicely written cover letter, in respond to an advertisement.
December 31, 2011
1234 Next Door Dr.
My City, My State, 11111
Dear Josey GiveMeAJob,
Your advertisement for the Sales Director position caught my attention.
Because of the remarkable parallel between your needs and my skills, I have sent you the enclosed resume via overnight delivery.
You can see I am proficient in:
- Ability to set and meet Sales Goals
- Generate new accounts
- Mentor and train new recruits
You will also observe I have significant experience in business to business sales, plus 4 years of management experience.
Your company intrigues me. We deserve to pursue these encouraging possibilities.
Please contact me for an appointment to meet.
Rocky I. NeedAJob
This letter is pretty good.
I like that:
It is not verbose, it gets to the point and answers the two key questions:
- Why is Rocky writing?
- Why should Josey care?
Of the five sentences, 4 start with “you” or “your.” And no sentence starts with an “I.” This is really powerful, I think, when you can structure a cover letter to put the emphasis on the “you,” the reader.
The letter is concise and succinct. Rocky resists the urge to crowd the cover letter with wordy bullet points or catchy jargons like “4 years of aggressive, pro-active management experience.”
Rocky puts in a pretty strong closing without being arrogant. He’s not begging and he has clear call to action.
By the way, this letter was created using Phil Baker’s OneClick Cover Letter Creator.
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