By Cindy Cullen
Of the four areas of my life that I feel I need to work on – health, wealth, relationships and spirituality – the one I seem to take for granted is relationships. After giving that area some thought this morning, I realize it’s the one I need to work on the most. And then I realized, that once again, there is synergy in my four areas of growth – they all rely on relationships.
Health: My health and well-being is directly dependent upon my relationship with me. If I don’t have a great relationship with me, then obviously my body and my life will start falling apart. I’ve found that no matter how much I want the other areas of my life to go well, without my health, I have nothing – at least not in the physical realm. So, I MUST have a great relationship with me and with my body.
Wealth: Since I was a very shy person growing up, I assumed that working with computers was going to be my ticket to making money without having to deal with many people. I tried that. I did make money, but it wasn’t much fun. Oh, it was fun for a while because I truly love what I do, but after a while, I realized that all the money in the world is no fun until you have someone with whom to share the wealth. I have found that only when I truly connect with others does my wealth sky-rocket. Not just financially, but emotionally, mentally and in all ways, abundance abounds.
Relationships: Of course, since I work at home and since my kids are here at home all day too, we relate on a very regular basis. I just assumed our relationships were A-OK. And they are for the most part. But, I’m learning that being together is not the same as building a relationship. Even though I’ve heard that for years, it’s finally becoming a reality to me – to really connect and build a great relationship, I have to take down the walls that I feel are protecting me and become real. I have to put my heart out there for the other person to see and touch, and I must allow the other person to do the same without judgment from me.
We must truly connect – not just be in the same room. To do that, I have to step out of my comfort zone on a regular basis and make a true effort to understand before I strive to be understood.
I have a great friend who showed me a sticker that he carries with him most everywhere he goes – I forget which bottle or jar or can he got it from, but it simply reads, “Remove inner seal”. He explained to me that that’s what we must do to truly connect with other people. He carries the sticker as a reminder. A very wise man.
I realize that a few bad relationships can spoil the whole bunch. Without any conscious effort on my part, those bad experiences have put more bricks on the wall that I’ve been building around my heart to protect it. Unfortunately, my other relationships – the good ones – are the ones who suffer. Of course, I am the one who suffers the most when I let that happen. When I get real with me, I must be honest about those bricks. It’s only by getting real with myself and with God, that those bricks can be pulverized.
Spiritual: I am a computer scientist and my brain works in a logical way, so I have to work things out in my head so that they make sense. It’s taken me a while to work this out in my head, but I’ve finally moved the knowing from my head to my heart – If my relationship (alignment, connection) with God – my source of all things, my creator, the One bigger than I, Who can only be found inside of me – is in great shape, then all my other relationships will somehow fall into place. It isn’t until I have removed that inner seal with God, that I will have the courage to remove that inner seal with myself, my friends, my business associates, and with my family.
Building relationships is really key to all areas of my life. I must ‘get real’ with everyone involved.